Something That Will Not Be Taken

My elder sister and I have an 8-year gap, and our relationship is quite tense. She often thinks I'm spoiled-perhaps because I've had opportunities or facilities from our parents that she didn't get when she was my age. I remember when I was in the 5th grade, my sister told me, "You’re so lucky. When I was your age, I took public transportation by myself, not like you." Then, I said, "Okay." Remember, we have an 8-year gap. It means she was about to graduate from high school. I also remember when I was in high school, my parents gave me a car after I got my driver's license. Can you guess what my sister said to me? Right, she said, “When I was your age, I STILL took public transportation by myself, not like you.”

            When I grew up, I got her points. My parents struggled financially in their early years of marriage, and it impacted their children. It affected my siblinghood. My elder sister grew up in a tough time, whereas I had a more stable financial situation. Same parents, different time and situation. So, when we are both adults and mature, I said to her, “I’m sorry if you have had such a rough childhood, at least compared with mine. I understand that what our parents gave to me is something that you wanted when you were a child or in your teenage years. I wish I could say this earlier, but what do you expect from a 5^th grader? The person I saw right now is an independent, strong, and diligent elder sister, and those are something I don’t have.” That night, we cried, but we brought comfort to our inner child.

            The question is, did my parents have anything to do with this? Of course, yes. Sometimes I feel bad if I get good grades at school, because my parents will be happy. Sometimes I don’t really feel secure if I achieve something, because my parents are going to be proud of me. And if my parents are happy because of their proud son, guess who doesn’t like it? Right, my elder sister. She starts comparing herself with me in her mind, and somehow, she has internalized an impostor since she was a teenager. She doesn’t like it, neither do I. So, I started to understand her.

            The more I understand my elder sister, the more I see Martha. For centuries, Martha has been portrayed as a complaining and worried woman, while her sister, Mary, sat down and listened to Jesus. Somehow, we saw Martha as the antagonist and Mary as the good person. Does Jesus have anything to do with this? Of course, yes. Jesus’ answer leaned in favor of Mary. “Martha, Martha, you are worried and distracted to many things; there is need of only one thing. Mary has chosen the better part, which will not be taken away from her.” That’s why churches for centuries might say, “Be more like Mary, not Martha.”

            Hannah Arendt, a German-American philosopher, talks about vita activa (“the active life”) and vita contemplativa (“the contemplative life”) as two ways humans live and find meaning. The vita activa is all about engaging with the world—working, creating, acting, and interacting with others to shape our shared reality. It’s life as participation and contribution. The vita contemplativa, on the other hand, is about stepping back to think, reflect, and seek truth—life as deep inner reflection and understanding. In history, philosophers often valued the contemplative life more, seeing thinking as higher than doing. But Arendt suggests we need to reconsider this, because acting and creating in the world are just as essential as thinking about it; they shape human freedom and the way we live together.

            Christianity understands this as via, instead of vita. Via is a way, a path, or a spirituality, instead of life or vita. Both via activa and via contemplativa are two different ways to seek God, to love God. In this sense, we might say Martha is doing via activa (preparing the communion, taking care of the community garden, organizing the food pantry, etc) and Mary is doing via contemplativa (just what we are doing right now: singing hymns, praying, listening to the sermon, and so on).

            So, does this mean that via activa is bad and via contemplativa is good, then? If we take a look at our first scripture reading, it is precisely the previous passage of Martha and Mary's story. When somebody asked Jesus who our neighbor is, he answered with a parable. There was a man who fell into the hands of robbers, who stripped him, beat him, and went away, leaving the man half dead. By chance, a priest was going the same direction, saw the man half dead, then passed by the other side. So does the Levite. Do you know what they both usually do? Precisely, via contemplativa!

            Then a Samaritan came, moved with pity, and actively took care of the man. Then we heard the divine judgment at the end, the one who actively shows mercy to the man. Jesus said, “Go and do likewise.” In other words, Jesus is not anti-via activa. If Jesus promotes via activa, then Mary and Martha are just two different expressions of loving God. Moreover, they are two different people. So, the message for us: Mary and Martha just being themselves. Mary with her via contemplative and Martha with her via activa.

            But at the end of the story, we still found Jesus disagreeing with Martha. Is there something wrong with Martha? Maybe. If there is one, it is not because Martha is too busy with her activity, but she asked Jesus to tell Mary not to be herself. Martha wants Mary to be like her, loving God by doing something active.

            Jesus also said, Mary has chosen the better part, which will not be taken away from her. What is something that will not be taken from her? The answer is being who she is, loving God the way she wants. We can’t change other people to not be themselves. For some people, to love God means being in church, sitting down, listening carefully. But for the others, they might not be seen on Sunday, because they think loving God means beyond the church.

            However, I understand that sometimes there are situations or moments when we need to be actively doing something. When there is injustice, when someone needs our help, or a matter of life or death, we need via activa, and we must not do via contemplativa. In the same way, when we are in the moment of via contemplativa like this, sometimes our mind is thinking of something else. “Oh, I should do this, I should do that. Oh, I need to work on Monday. What is my appointment tomorrow? Oh, I will do laundry after church.” Et cetera. I understand that these are important and also a way to love God, but today we're learning how to be present.

            By the way, there are so many ways to love God. It is just a coincidence that Jesus visited Martha and Mary, so we learn via activa and via contemplativa today. But if Jesus came to my grandparents' house, he would meet eight siblings. We might learn via naturalis, a person who feels God’s presence through nature, the wind, the sky, the animals. We might learn via caritatis, a person who loves God by sharing what they have. We might learn via positiva, a person who loves God through logic and reason. And so on.

            If you look at the bulletin cover, you might see four people. From the right, Martha, who holds a cup, Mary, who sits down, Jesus, who is pointing at Mary, and who is the other guy? It’s Lazarus. He is the person who died and was resurrected by Jesus in the Gospel of John. These siblings are actually not just Martha and Mary, but there is also Lazarus. In the Gospel of Luke, Lazarus never talks. We don’t even know if he exists in this story.

            If you try to Google Luke 10:38-42 in the image section, most of them are only three people: Jesus, Martha, and Mary—just like our scripture reading. However, some interpretations suggest that Lazarus was present and said nothing. This is interesting: if Martha is via contemplative, Mary is via activa, then Lazarus is via silentia, loving God in silence. So, the good news is these three siblings have their own special place in Jesus’ heart, whether they love God actively, through contemplation, or even in silence. Therefore, you and I are also special, because we are precious in front of God. Amen.